Escape All the Things

Switched my schedule up a bit this week to train at nights to help Rachael prep for the Seattle Open. This means doing my workout in the morning, which is fine once I'm awake and warmed up. Had one of my best heavy lift sessions yesterday morning though so maybe there's something to morning lifts.

I bought the Bill Cooper Escapes series and decided to work on submission escapes for awhile. He shows some interesting techniques, some of which are going to take me awhile to figure out. One frustrating thing is that he describes techniques literally ("put your right hand here") and there's not much inclusion of mechanics or concepts. Some of the "why" I already know, but in other instances I don't and am figuring out on my own...which may be better for me in the end anyway.

It's inspired me to do an sub escape class during Fundamentals, since we rarely cover escapes in any of the regular classes. 

I finally got up the nerve to tell James that I wasn't doing Masters. He took it well and called me up after class to double-check that everything was ok with me which was really pretty nice. 

I'm noticing a full two months into working out that I'm feeling more confident as far as strength and cardio is concerned on the mat. Rolling has generally been feeling pretty decent. Still some ego crush rolls here and there, but by and large I'm enjoying most of the rolls regardless of the outcome and regardless of the choices that I made during the roll. 

I might be giving private lessons to a kid soon. I think he's around 10y/o or so. I'm going to give it one lesson and see how it goes. I generally have a really hard time relating to and talking with pre-teen kids because they're basically little aliens. If I don't feel like I'm doing a good job with him I won't charge the Dad and will recommend that he find someone else.

Triceptarous

I was foam rolling before class the other day and Sarah noticed that my triceps were bigger than she remembered. Less than two months of lifting and it's paying off...

Since I've decided not to do Masters I've had one class that was a real bummer but the remainder have been good. I've also been rolling with quite a few white belts, so there's that. Jason S and I rolled the other and while he dominated for the most part, I had a very legitimate sweep into side control that wasn't so much a learned technique as taking advantage of his weight and positioning. I was pretty excited about that.

Rolled with Kasey today, who was more or less letting me work (but I have a hard time telling). Got a paper cutter from top side that felt good. However, somewhere along the way my IT band got pissed about something and bothered me for the remainder of my rolls. Sat out the last round with Chris, who gave me some excellent advice for stretching and applying pressure. Hours later it's feeling almost a 100%. Will probably move tonight's workout to tomorrow just to make sure I don't goof anything up.

I'm feeling peaceful about not doing Masters.

Mind Games

I decided not to compete at Master Worlds. My mind isn't right when it comes to jiu jitsu, and  it won't be worth the pressure, $$ and time spent going to Vegas if my heart isn't in it. This is a less drastic measure than what I was initially planning on, which was to take a month long break from jiu jitsu. 

I've had a series of experiences lately in which I've been putting too much pressure on myself since being promoted and class just hasn't been that much fun as a result. And by "not fun", I mean I've left class a number of times miserable. In addition, I swear that I have regressed in technique. I am literally just befuddled when I'm stuck in someone's guard. It's like I'm back at my one stripe blue knowledge level.. 

I know that I know and can execute many techniques. The shit that I do when I roll though is so incredibly limited it's not even funny. I try to open up my game and I get creamed. I'm making a lot of poor decisions, some which are due to having a poor frame of mind. I absolutely hate being the only brown belt at our gym that gets tapped by blue belts. As much as I'd like to not have that be a factor, it eats at me. Of course, once I convince myself I suck, then I'm truly sunk.

The short answer is that I'm not going to compete for awhile and I'm not going to try to work my way out of this funk. I'm going to take a step back, try to ignore my belt color, focus on a couple of positions, chill the fuck out and hopefully start having fun again.